A GRIP ON SPORTS * A supermarket nearby touts its cheap chicken on Mondays. Usually we buy a few strips, spicy and regular, cut them up and put them in a salad. It's a great way to end the day that starts the week. What in this column is analogous to that chicken? How about a few cheap shots, some spicy, some not?
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* The Seahawk defense was certainly spicy yesterday. The group basically threw a shutout, only giving up points after an ill-advised Geno Smith pass gave the Dolphins the ball in the red zone. Those early three didn't portend anything. Well, anything but how unmovable the group would be later in the game when Miami had a first-and-goal at the 3-yard line.
The Dolphins got nothing. Not even a field goal as their fourth-down pass went awry. OK, there were extenuating circumstances. Miami was without either its usual starting quarterback - Tua Tagovailoa, out with a concussion - or backup - Skylar Thompson, chest injury - by that point. Third-stringer Tim Boyle was in charge and he never looked comfortable in that role.
But the NFL is filled with extenuating circumstances every week. Heck, Leonard Williams - chest injury - and Bryon Murphy II - hamstring issue - were not on the field in the second half and the defense overcame the loss of two of its upfront stalwarts in the 24-3 victory.
* The offense? The only thing hot about it was Smith's reaction after the game. He was ticked at himself. Two picks. A disjointed second and third quarters.
That was his public face. We're only guessing, sure, but privately he probably shared his disgust with the group's multiple mistakes. Penalties, sacks and other issues led to seven - yes, seven - third downs of 15 yards or more.
It's tough to keep any momentum or rhythm when you are facing third and forever constantly. When the offense was clean, it was effective. Here's a novel idea. Have more clean possessions. Problem solved.
* Yes, 3-0 is the best record the Hawks could have after three weeks. Two games clear of the other three NFC West members? That's also as good as they could do, considering the Rams have already played Arizona and San Francisco.
Yet we don't know who or what Seattle really is. Denver, New England and a Tua-less Miami team aren't the gold standard of the NFL. Detroit, the opponent in seven days? Well, if not gold then at least silver, though a 2-1 record, including an overtime home win over L.A., isn't all that shiny.
If Seattle flies home from Michigan still undefeated, we'll have to concede Mike Macdonald's first team is pretty darn good. After all, part of the league's gospel, according to the venerated Bill Parcells, states "you are what your record says you are." Today, the Hawks are undefeated. That's enough.
* The Mariners' record is 80-76 after their come-from-ahead 6-5 loss to Texas on Sunday. They have six games left to play. More than likely no more. No playoffs. They are mediocre. At best. Heck, they aren't even winning 54% of their games, team president Jerry Dipoto's gold standard.
Houston is one win from clinching its seventh American League West title in the past eight years. Host the M's for three starting tonight. The Astros have won 54% of its games. Which means Dipoto was right. In that regard, at least. In building a playoff team? No, he will have missed once again.
The West, a division the Mariners led by 10 games in mid-June, is out of reach. Grabbing the final wild-card spot would require either Detroit or Kansas City, which has lost seven consecutive games, losing at least three games and Minnesota two of their final six. That's if the M's win all six. Five? Add another loss to those A.L. Central teams' records.
Factor in the Tigers finish with three at home against the 36-120 White Sox and that scenario seems about as likely as the Hawks finishing 17-0.
* The White Sox are so bad, the Twins, Royals and Tigers had an unfair advantage in the wild-card race. The trio will have played Chicago 13 times each this season. Minnesota and Kansas City are already 12-1. The Tigers are 9-1 with the three games left.
The M's and Red Sox, the other two A.L. teams vying for a spot? They had fewer games with the worst team ever. Seattle finished 5-1. Boston? Only 4-3. The Red Sox should be eliminated on that alone. And probably will be.
Zephyr: Spokane picked up its first USL Super League win Sunday, topping DC Power FC 1-0 at ONE Spokane Stadium. Haley Thomas' early header stood up in the win.
Mariners: The offense came alive in the sixth inning. Gave Bryan Woo a five-run lead. It didn't stand up. Host Texas roared back and won 6-5.
Kraken: Seattle opened preseason with an uneven performance at home against Calgary.
Storm: The fourth quarter started with Seattle leading two-time defending WNBA champion Las Vegas in their first-round playoff series. The quarter ended with the host Aces celebrating a 78-67 victory. And the Storm having scored two points - in the entire quarter.
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* We have a pretty long list of things to get done today. Yes, napping is on it. But other, more taxing activities are written in ink as well. We still have not gotten this retirement thing right. Until later ...